God's eyes

Everybody could be pretty with makeup, cloths and heels.

I won't be beautiful forever and I will die some day. I want people to appreciate me for myself not the pretty face. This will fade away in 20 years. But my breath will stop whenever it is, not in my acknowledgement.

I'm still an idiot.

Dear god,

I know He is keeping the best one for me

Even I read all the books in the world, discover all the solution to the world problem, or become the smartest woman alive, I'm still an idiot, because this world is not the eternity for me to make money, fame, or knowledgeable  What I become in the end everything is nothing and that something that I'm not knowing could be everything that I want. God, bless me, help me in my journey in becoming your follower. Repelled those evil spirits. Help me find the way to be the best follower. I pray to U, because, U made me, U made this world and put me into this world. I Love YOU so much.

By:  JYOO

Justified Every unjustified

Maybe it's because of i'm popping pills in prescription from the doc, so, something in my body is so abnormal, dream of Mr. Z confess to me that he had feeling to me, having some K from him and the world is going to end. A space ship is used to escape, but being chase by someone, and most of all wanted to watched the big P. What else, I have done my presentation yesterday, most of it was seen my mistake by the lecturer and i'm glad they do seen my mistake. Beside that, I'm on YM and saw some psychotic sexual maniac having fun. Don't have the civilization at all. What the crazy man. haha

By JYOO

One and two line

             I got FYP to do, I got many homework to do, and I got many commitment. I can't think about feelings, can't care too much about love, I'm not a multitasker. so it's a  shame for me. I want this to come to an end but not with the tsunami. I just want to relax without anything on my butt to ask me to do those task.

My fight

               My current weight right now is 62 kg, used to be 65 kilogram 2 months ago, i manage to loss 6.6  pound, my weight goal is 55 kg and within 2 months with vegetarian carbs eating habit with exercises to shade this weight away from my body. I want to build my abs muscle but at the same time to loss weight, I really need to loss weight. I urge to feel beautiful again. I was growing being told you are ugly, thats why I don't have self confident at all. When people told me you are beautiful, all i was thinking about is they telling me lie, stop telling me lie, I hate lies, I was lied to so many time, I hate those promises that they can't kept, stop promising people if you can keep it. It's so unman if you do so. Don't try to tell me what to do, you are not my father. You are nothing to me related yet, or never will be.

People told me that muscle weight a lot but compacted compare to fat, so I will not look fat even I had weight heavy. That's so not true, I want to shade all this fat and get more muscular and lean body. It's my dream body, I hate to be fat, and heavy, I can't wear a beautiful dress with this big flabby arm. I hate these arm.

运动是健康！

Dare to be me

Despicable me

大家来运动吧。高高兴兴的做运动，能够把一切烦恼丢掉了。不用在烦世界的事情了。

我的愿望。

我希望有一天我嫁给以为有钱人。我要生四个孩子。我要身重55公斤。我的身高是166公分。我想做磨特儿。虽然，我不美我不高，但是，这还是我的愿望啊。不要背叛我因为我是很脆弱的。

文习工课。

我要温习工课

烦脑

每一天都要面对这一些我以斤很累了。 请你不要在来烦我了。

我喜欢你我稀望有一天你知道。

        我每一天都有烦脑， 爱情对我来说是已没有意思了。 为何要我面对这见事情呢？ 我以经没有力量来面对这一切问题。 我西望我能够望掉全部一干二静的。 但是，这一以经变成我最深的应向。

word of god for the day

12.01a.m.

8th march 2011

All Things Are Possible

Read Deuteronomy 9:1 through 11:25; Mark 9:2—24

Many persons refuse to believe in miracles. Indeed, by definition, to perform a miracle is to do something that cannot be done by ordinary means. Even Christians may struggle to believe that the power of God can accomplish the impossible.

A father had a son who was possessed by an evil spirit. The religious leaders were powerless to help, and Jesus’ disciples failed to bring deliverance. Desperately the man appealed directly to Jesus, “Help us, if you can!”

Everything is possible for him who believes (Mark 9:23).

Jesus’ response clearly affirmed that the man’s son could be delivered. The father correctly evaluated the condition of his own faith; it was incomplete. The son was delivered because Jesus helped the father to believe.

Like the father, most Christians live with a mixture of faith and doubt. They want to believe for a miracle, but fear the disappointment of unanswered prayer. The Spirit gives Christians the ability to believe God can do miracles.

Challenge for Today: Direct your faith to God who can and will do what is impossible.

Quicklook: Mark 9:14–24

Old injury still here

11.28PM

7th March 2011

    

            My sprained toe still swollen. just like my sprained heart. It's always there. I just can't get enough to stand up again and do the trial and error. It's too hard to find a soul mate but it is so easy to find a friend that is just called friend on the name it. How far is the friend is called friend. Is it just a little 'Hai', or 'Ah, I know him he is my friend."? or, 'We are classmate back then'. It was not easy to understand a human behaviour totally, even though they claimed they know you, for example your parents but then, You still the only person know what you are. Because you are developing and discovering yourself in this life. Last word, don't judge a girl by it's cover, don't say it if you don't mean it, cause people might get hurt with those fake statement that you make about them. You have the right to say it, but mind your own business because you might want people to remember you on your kindness not your rudeness. Please behave!

By      JYOO

The dull story: me me me me me me

  7th March 2011
  11.07 PM

           My day started with bumpy, I woke up at 7.12 A.M. My head hanging with those question that could never be answer and only time can tell what would happen to me in future. I can only do what I think is logical. Thinking back, turning my head looking on the foot print that I left behind, it seems, I had walk so far to get myself to this place, but when I get here, I seem lost and don't know what's next, and everything I do seems to be copy and pasting others path because of I want to be seen by those people that I had in my life. How ever, everything won't happen like I was expected no matter how hard I tried. I'm just another object that don't have any value in those pairs of eyes. Where do I go from here, I'm not stepping on the real earth anymore, each and every dream that I had dream of seems to be fantasy forever. I wish that someday I could be get my self into that fantasy.
         I need to stand up straight and find my own motivation for myself. In this world, no one is looking no one. Except you had something special in you. Like those famous actor or actress with good looking and talent in acting. Those singers with sweet voice which may mesmerizes you with the captivating lyrics and touch your soul deeply. Finally, at this point, I started to turn my self into God, trying hard to pray but it seems that nothing can help me. Even Him can't. I don't understand this life. Too complicated for a little soul. Too hard and rough for a fragile little heart. Too fast and difficult for a little timid human.
        What's next after all of this big obstacles had been hurdles over? This one is the big hurdles for me, because people grows up, the more things being discovered, exposed to love life which I could never imagine could hurt this soul so much. I tried to heal this little soul but it seems that effortless was needed because it will never healed and never gonna be the same anymore. Because this cut is the deepest cut I had and I keep this to myself. I don't know whether I grew me up or making me childish? Psychologically, I could be gone crazy by now. Being strong is the only thing that I could do. I'm faking it. I face it as if all of this is nothing to me. Somehow. When I was thirsty with the attention, sharing, and caring, anything that a normal human needs, I could burst into tears anytime it could be. What I need is to crack open this wall that I had build for the longest time ago since I was child. My childhood was rough and hard. I makes me feel I'm the worst out of all. Want all of this go away quickly as possible.
        Hoping is the only thing that I could do. I just need to close my eyes and think that this just only dream, and be less emotionally involve and everything will be fine.

By JYOO

When the moon is talking back

        

My feeling about my life.

Just shoot me darling.

            Today I had midterm of tuber crop, I hope I can do the midterm. I'm confused with myself right now. Everything seems to be not right. I need space for myself. I believe I just need myself to be love by someone and settling down. I don't have the soul for all these crap, I don't even have any vision on what am I going to do with my life. I'm loss, I need map and GPS to show me where am I and where should I be. I need some guidance to show me the way.

By JYOO